Homosexuality

Dear Internet,

   Today I am going to blog about homosexuality.
   My parents, as Catholics, have been kind of a thorn in my side on this issue, because they insist on sticking to the traditional beliefs, put forth by closed-minded, egotistical, fear-all-that-are-not-like-us people thousands of years ago, and if they ever found out that I supported homosexuals, they would either disown me or throw a Bible at me and watch me as they forced me to read every word until I'd memorized the damned thing.   The Bible has parts in it that are obviously against homosexuality, and homosexuality is frowned on by Christians.  It is seen as impure and wrong, as a disease, as a choice, as a sin.
   I have seen reason enough to convince me that homosexuality is not a choice; therefore how can it be a sin?  God created us all lovingly with our own crosses to bear.  Some of us are shy, some of us are not-too-bright, some of us are stubborn, and some of us are gay.  It's not really a choice, in my opinion, because of a few very compelling arguments I've heard.
1) If you have a homosexual relative, then you more than likely have more than one homosexual relative.
2) Therapy does not work.  It only frustrates them, because someone else has told them that homosexuality is wrong, and they want to do the right thing, but they just can't.
3) Why on Earth would a person decide to get made fun of in early adolescence, throughout all of middle school and high school?  Why would they choose to look for something so rare- it's hard enough to find The One; why insist on someone that is part of such a small group?  Why ostracize yourself and make life hard on yourself?  Who would choose to live like this?
   Saying that it is genetic is sort of puzzling, because how could it be?  Logically, if two people of opposite genders are gay, or even if only one of them is gay, why would they have sex with a member of the opposite gender, when they are repulsed by members of the opposite gender?  It makes no sense.  So how can a gay person have a baby?
   Well, my answer is, typically, the gay people of the world do not have children.  --So then, how...?
Because- I believe that it is sort of like a recessive trait, except that it is a mutation of a gene (or certain genes) having to do with sex drive.  It is not entirely genetic; environmental factors can either negate, lessen, or encourage the trait.  But I do think that it could be genetic.  But this is only a theory I have... there is not much research that really shows either way, whether it is genetic or not.
   Anyway.
   I have personally met both homosexual men and women, and I have to say that, especially for men, this trait seems to be something they cannot control.  (Weirdly, the women I met had made a choice to be homosexual.  One of them was fed up with men in general, and had been getting crushes on women and men throughout adolescence.  The other had a phobia of penises, was repulsed by them, but did not find out until she saw one.  Up until that point, she had been primarily interested in men.  After that point, she became interested solely in women...)  (The men, though, said that they would change their sexual orientation if they could...)
   I, myself, am bi-curious.  I have always enjoyed looking at both women and men, and as I see women as more beautiful in general, I more often remark on a beautiful woman than a beautiful man.  (But then, I'm very picky when it comes to men, so it is not very often that I meet/observe one which I find attractive.)  However, although I do enjoy looking at women, I have managed to convince my mother, at least, that it is a purely artistic thing (I am an artist), and that I am simply admiring beauty.  I would never become lesbian for three reasons: One, my parents would disown me; Two, I want children, and I need a man to do that; Three, although I have had little crushes on women here and there, I have never been in love with one.  I have only ever fallen in love with men.
   So I am straight for the sake of dating and future spouse purposes, and I would never have sex with a girl, but I still enjoy looking at them, especially when they are naked, or when they have wonderful breasts.  I have had fantasies where I am a man and I am having sex with a woman, but although I wanted to be male for most of my life, I realized sometime over the past few years that my brain is wired to be a woman.  I considered getting a sex change through most of adolescence, but I realized that I want to be a mother, and I am attracted most strongly to men, so it would be best if I stayed female.
   This being the case, and me having been close to homosexuals socially and emotionally, I am a bit biased towards them.  But those that are against homosexuality either have not been exposed to it or else are afraid of it, and I think that is sad.
   Marriage is supposed to be between a man and a woman.  Homosexuals would like to change that definition to being a union between two people who want to love (and have sex with) solely each other for the rest of their lives.  I say, if two people love each other, it does not matter what their race or gender or financial standing or social standing is, what their background is, or what their religion is.  If two people love each other enough to dedicate their lives to each other, then I say Love is Love.  Let them to it.  Who are they hurting?  Nobody.
   So yes, Internet, although I have to hide it, I do support gay marriage.

   It is sad that I have to hide things like this from my parents.  I wish they would be more open and accepting.  There are even a few friends that I have to hide these type of thoughts from... but I love them, so I do hide these thoughts from them.
   That is a bit of a conflict with me, because I believe in being as honest as possible.  A lie, no matter how seemingly innocent or small, is still a lie, and it is always painful when the truth is found out.  I say that there is no excuse, ever, for telling a lie, even if the lie is just not telling the truth.  But think of it this way: You do not tell a child about sex, even though it is true.  That is not a lie; it is the withholding of certain information to protect their innocence.  So in a way, it is to protect these friendships that I am not telling them, because they do not need to know these things about me.
   All the same... I still wish my parents would be more open-minded.